There was a day when I felt again that it takes time to get people to open their hearts to the lonely hearts that thought “no one needs me or recognizes me anyway” when they were young.
Or perhaps it is better to say that it took me a long time to realize that childhood thought.
Everyone has “true feelings and preconceived notions”.
I always think that it is very difficult for people who have lived with loneliness caused by anxiety and fear to open their hearts to others.
Because consciously I think my mind is open.
But the subconscious mind does not.
They make it seem like they are open, but they hide their true feelings in a flirtatious manner.
The longer it has been since they closed their hearts, the harder it is for them to open the door to their hearts.
This is because time has passed and even the person himself has faded away, and his thoughts and memories of those days have faded.
I basically do not force this door open.
Rather, this door is a door that can never be forced open.
And if I can live happily without opening this door, I don’t think I need to open it.
But there are some problems that cannot be solved without having that door opened.
The door to the heart that was opened this time was such a door.
I was stuck in front of the door, stuck in my anxiety and fear, even though I wished I could live in a place where everyone was bright and cheerful.
I want to go, but I can’t.
Because they are afraid of failure.
Some would say that if you fail, just try again.
But there is nothing more frightening than failure for a person who had to bear everything on his own, with no one to help him when he was a child.
If there is no certainty of success, and if I fail, and if I have to deal with the aftermath of failure on my own, I think it is only natural that I would choose not to do something rather than to do it.
So it’s no surprise that they don’t have the courage to act all the time.
On the day I found these heartfelt thoughts, the client cried and I felt inadequate for not having found them earlier.
